Michael Markham on Existence
Emergence of a Story
The sense of self is not fixed; it emerges from the interplay of ideas, emotions, and connections that constantly reshape our understanding of who we are. This identity is like a sand mandala, evolving from countless strands of thought, memory, and interaction, each contributing to our existence’s evolving story.
Identity and Meaning
We exist as reflections of light, mirrored in the presence of others. The people closest to us, those we hold most dear, serve as the primary sources of this radiance. These cherished relationships provide the emotional nourishment and validation that shape our identity and give our lives meaning.
Loss
When we lose someone we deeply cherish, it feels as though a vital part of ourselves has been severed. The reflection they provided, the light they shared, is suddenly gone, leaving a palpable emptiness. It’s not just their physical presence we miss; it’s the part of ourselves that was brought to life through our connection with them.
Their absence creates a void, a silence where there was once a vibrant exchange of love, understanding, and shared experiences.
This void cannot be filled or replaced. It lingers as a shadow that follows us through the rest of our days. The world feels dimmer without their light, and the sense of loss becomes a constant companion.
Yet, this emptiness also speaks to the depth of the shared bond. The pain of loss is a testament to the love that once was, a reminder of that person’s profound impact on our lives. Their influence doesn’t vanish; it becomes part of the quilt of who we are, woven into our story in a way that continues to shape us, even in their absence.
Over time, the void may transform. It doesn’t disappear, but it changes shape, becoming a quiet space where memories reside and where love continues to echo. The light they shared with us doesn’t extinguish; it becomes part of the light we carry forward, illuminating our path and guiding us through the darkness.
In this way, those we lose remain with us, not as distant memories but as living parts of our ongoing journey. They continue to shape our identity, not through their physical presence, but through the enduring impact of their light and love.
Identity
In the end, our identity is a reflection of the connections we forge and the light we share with others. Each relationship leaves an imprint, contributing to the ever-evolving story of who we are. When we lose someone, it may feel as though a part of us has been taken away, but in truth, their light becomes part of our own, a guiding presence that remains with us, even in the vast emptiness of loss.